Help! I Can't Remember What I Was Going to Say!

I heard it again today:  “I freeze up after questions, even though I know the answer.” This was from a client seeking interview coaching. My public speaking participants also lament “brain freeze.”   Emotional Intelligence and brain science can explain what’s happening.  Our nervousness triggers our flight/fight response. Our amygdala “hijacks” the neocortex, including the language centers of the brain. Now we can’t remember what we were going to say.

What can we do?  Practice! Whether presenting or interviewing we need to practice. Even personal stories need refinement.

Practice! When we practice we create stronger synaptic pathways in our brain related to our message. We’ll be more able to access our message since it has a stronger structure in our brain.

Also, find ways to relax. We can:
·      Take a supplement like kava (both relaxes the brain while enhancing focus)
·      Practice deep breathing
·      Use a visualization (our memories of great times in beautiful places can help). As we relax the amygdala stops firing and we can regain access to our higher thinking brain.

Create positive speaking experiences:

·      Take a class that will progressively give challenges while ensuring success (see www.training4breakthroughs.com!)
·      Speak more often at meetings or other functions.
·      Over time we can learn to trust ourselves and our abilities.

Remember that no one is perfect.  Even if we could memorize our presentation and deliver it flawlessly, we’ve missed the great opportunity to connect with our audience. Our listeners don’t want perfection, they crave our authenticity and passion.  If we’ve prepared and know our message, our inevitable small word-fumbles won’t matter to our audience. We won’t draw attention to small gaffes and we’ll treat any larger ones light-heartedly, with self-deprecating humor.